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World’s First Underwater Internet Cafe Opens, Promises Truly ‘Deep Web’ Experience

Forget crowded coffee shops with spotty Wi-Fi; ocean enthusiasts now have the ultimate distraction-free workspace. Nestled amongst the coral reefs just off the coast of Bermuda lies “The Deep Dive,” the world’s first underwater internet cafe.

“We wanted to push the boundaries of remote work,” says Marina Del Ray, founder of The Deep Dive. “What’s more inspiring than checking emails alongside a passing sea turtle? Silence, serenity, and the occasional octopus photobomb. That’s the experience we’re selling.”

Of course, underwater internet presents unique challenges. The cafe broadcasts a special waterproof Wi-Fi signal, only accessible with specialized, and rather bulky, dive gear add-ons. Guests must also contend with limited battery life (“dead laptop” takes on a new meaning here) and the ever-present risk of a curious shark nibbling your charging cord.

Despite the drawbacks, reviews are mixed. “Finally, a place free of screaming kids and loud phone calls,” raved one freelancer, conveniently ignoring the parrotfish loudly chewing coral outside the cafe’s panoramic acrylic window. A less-impressed writer complained, “Took an hour to find the waterproof keyboard, then some squid squirted ink all over my report! 2/5 stars.”

The Deep Dive team is unfazed by criticism. Plans for expansion are already underway. “We envision underwater co-working pods, ‘sea-floor slacklining’ breaks, even networking events where you mingle with the local manta rays,” gushes Del Ray.

Whether the concept sinks or swims, one thing is certain: the term “Deep Web” just got a whole lot more literal. Now, the only question is whether fighting an angry octopus for your laptop is considered a valid excuse for a missed deadline.

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