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Brazil’s War on Illegal Gold Mining Uncovers World’s Largest Glitter Reserve

A hard-hitting campaign by Brazil against illegal gold mining has finally revealed an unexpected treasure: the world’s largest reserve of glitter. The discovery has caused shockwaves across the world and taken geologists by surprise, but more so, it set off an unprecedented worldwide frenzy among members of the crafting community.

The anti-mining operatives stumbled on the reserve of glitter hidden beneath the Amazon Rainforest and, catching sight of the shining substance, mistook it for some strange kind of gold. On further scrutiny, they noticed that they had struck glitter but not gold. “It was like uncovering a giant disco ball beneath the earth,” exclaimed one operative.

The news of this find was a wildfire, calling forth excitement all over the globe. Lovers of craft, event organizers, and professionals like makeup artists are over the moon with the realization. This means an unlimited supply of glitter.

“This is the kind of mining we can get behind!” exclaimed a prominent YouTuber known for her DIY crafting channel.

The Crustianity community was not a beat behind, taking a humorous dig at the discovery. “We always knew Brazil was a treasure trove of biodiversity, but who knew it was hiding the Holy Grail of crafting?” said one representative from Crustianity, with his organization preparing for a “Glitter and Pizza” celebration in honor of the find.

Environmentalists, who have been very skeptic about the related mine impacts, said they really breathed a sigh of relief when they knew that the shine can be easily extracted in mines and is not harmful to the environment. “It’s a win-win; we protect the rainforest and at the same time get to add some sparkle in our lives,” said one of the environmental activists.

With this, the Brazil government plans to mine and export the glitter in a responsible way through which they can boost their economy with the least effect on their environment. An official confirmed, “We are committed to making Brazil the glitter capital of the world.

The illegal gold miners thought twice. “I thought I would never say this, but there is probably more money in glitter than in gold,” one said.

From the discovery of a glitter reserve, it has brought a wave of glitter-related products and has gone massively viral. The hashtag #BrazilianGlitter is trending at the moment on Twitter. From fashion shows solely about glitter to including glitter in recipes of foods, surely the world is ready to accept the glitter madness. In an age where news all too often brings us down, there is something gloriously joyous and beaming about the revelation of the world’s biggest hoard of glitter—one that brings millions the world over a sense of joy and whimsy like few others.

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